This is a
continuation to my blog posts Day
84 - Who and What am I ‘Living’ for? and Day 85 - Fear of Living for REAL
Self-Forgiveness - Part 2
I forgive myself
that I have accepted
and allowed myself to have manifested a fear
of others in order to avoid the core point at hand which is the self-judgment I
have accepted and allowed myself to participate within/as.
I forgive myself
that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear what others think
about me in relation to how I participate within my physical reality.
I forgive myself
that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear
that others don't approve of me, and from this I forgive myself that I have
accepted and allowed myself to compromise
myself in everything I do due to the point of trying to get approval from
others so that I can be in their 'good books'. From this I forgive myself that
I have accepted and allowed myself to use this fear as a cover up to not have
to face the actual point at hand here, which is that I do not approve of myself
but instead constantly and continuously keep myself locked into this pattern of
existing within inferiority/superiority through allowing
self-judgment to become me through the process
of thinking/back-chatting
about how I 'fit into' a certain specific situation and/or a being's world and
reality.
Thus, in this
moment, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not approve
of myself but to have instead always only existed within a relationship
of self-judgment within/as myself where from I always either
categorize/judge/place myself into the polarity of being
'inferior' or 'superior' at any given time
in order to perpetuate my existence within/as self-judgment.
I forgive myself
that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I will be excluded from
activities which I would like to participate within due to the belief that
those suggestion/directing the activities will choose to not include me based
on certain judgments
they might have about me. From this I forgive myself that I have accepted and
allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I have projected onto
others the point of being excluded, instead of realizing that the actual point
here is that I have accepted and allowed myself to in fACT exclude myself from
activities due to my OWN judgment
of myself.
I forgive myself
that I have accepted and allowed myself to think/belief/perceive that I am
somehow not worthy of participating within certain specific activities due to
judging myself as this - unworthy.
I forgive myself
that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I will be attacked in some
way by others if I step out of this fear and allow myself to really investigate
who I am within my living
application of myself through not allowing this fear to direct me, but to
instead allow myself to be the director of who I accept and allow myself to be
within/as myself.
A few memories just
popped up in relation to this point, which I will walk through within my next
blog post:
Memory 1:
School Excursion
Memory 2:
Someone suggested exercises
in order to lose weight. Trigger point - "there must be something wrong
with me"
Memory 3:
Not too cool for
school
*******************
No comments:
Post a Comment